


If you want to find something you have to lose it first

by SuperTrouperLights



Category: Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Black Sabith Week 2020, Day four: fate, F/F, Fate Sisters - Freeform, Red String of Fate, Shout out to Macbeth the only piece of literature I care about, and will purposefully insert in everything I write, but that still doesn't exist on my book so..., lets all thank shakespeare, okay so this is post part 2 in terms of events but partially has some events from part 3, this is set in the future i have no idea when but sabrina is over 18 calm your shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:55:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24411664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperTrouperLights/pseuds/SuperTrouperLights
Summary: Day four: fateSabrina screws up and she finds that the only way to fix things is by summoning the Three Fate Sisters
Relationships: Sabrina Spellman/Mary Wardwell | Madam Satan | Lilith
Comments: 3
Kudos: 40
Collections: Black Sabith Week 2020





	If you want to find something you have to lose it first

Sabrina had put everybody she loved in danger. And of course, it wasn’t her fault she was born into this mess, but it would be her fault if she didn’t try to do everything in her power to save them.

All of her mortal friends had left Greendale; Nick hated her for putting him through literal hell; Ambrose and Prudence were trying to find Blackwood again; her aunts were barely talking to her; and then there was Lilith.

Sabrina had promised her she would take care of everything. She would transfer Satan from Nicholas to Blackwood’s body and then imprison him. Everybody would win and everything would be okay. Lilith had put her trust in her, but Sabrina failed.

Lilith’s expression when Sabrina told her the news was like a punch to the stomach. Her eyes were sad and defeated when she wrapped her arms around the half-witch in a tight hug.

 _“It was fun while it lasted, wasn’t it, my dear?”_ Lilith sighed into white curls before she stepped back. _“Thank you for trying, darling. I…”_ She hesitated for a moment, her voice too full of emotion. _“I’ll miss you, Sabrina.”_

And then Lilith was gone in a cloud of fire.

Sabrina was standing in the middle of the Greendale forest, right at the place she was born.

She was mixing a few things in a cauldron in front of her, a dozen different unholy sigils painted on the grass with salt. She spoke the words with clarity as she mixed in. Sabrina was attempting to make what was probably one of the most difficult summoning spells to perform, but she had to at least try.

When the mixture was done, Sabrina took a string of red wool and tied up one end to her wrist, throwing the rest inside the cauldron.

“Double, double toil and trouble,

Fire burn and cauldron bubble.

I call upon thee, the Moirai Sisters,

Full of wisdom, full of whispers.

Come to me, and let me see whatever it shall be.”

The sigils on the floor caught on fire, creating a big cloud of gray smoke as the cauldron started bubbling, and slowly, the red string tied up to Sabrina’s wrist started to tense and rise, stretching in front of her. When the smoke dissipated, three witches were standing across from Sabrina - and she gave a step back just for precaution. 

_“Sabrina Spellman.”_ They said in unison.

“Speak.”

“Demand.”

“We’ll answer.”

Each of the witches spoke and Sabrina stood there, incredulous that the spell had actually worked. The light of the moon and the fire beneath their feet lit up the forest around them.

“I- I want to change my life.”

“Do you wish to change your past?”

“Your present?”

“Or your future?”

“I- I don’t--” Sabrina stuttered but was cut off by the witches again.

“We see you are in doubt.”

“You look for the runaway crown,”

“But what is not lost, cannot be found.”

The witches talked in riddles and Sabrina was growing annoyed. She didn’t have time for this.

She couldn’t stop thinking about Lilith. She had no idea where the woman was and every second that passed meant that Satan was closer to finding her - if He hadn't already. Everyday Sabrina was worried sick, thinking that she was the reason Lilith was all alone, hiding from the Dark Lord. It was her fault.

“Look, people I love are in danger. I need to save them. I- I need to know what to do.” Sabrina’s voice was shaky. The witches stared back at her with unreadable eyes.

“We are not fortune-tellers.”

“We are writers. We know everything that was, is and will be.”

“You don’t seek solutions. You seek _hope.”_

“And you are no better than the rest to learn of what’s to come.”

“But you said I could ask and you would answer, didn’t you?” Sabrina defied the witches and they stayed in silence. The half-witch stood there, quietly observing them until she felt a small tug on the string around her wrist.

“We can cut that red string short.”

“We can elongate it as far as it goes.”

“And we can redirect it however it pleases thee.”

“But magic comes with a price.”

“And to meddle with one’s journey,”

“Is a charge far too large to pay.”

They talked in riddles but Sabrina wasn’t stupid. This time she understood very well what the witches were trying to say.

“We offer you a peak.”

“Show you what you seek.”

“Follow the red string and you will find what you wish.”

“There is no answer. But it is at the end.”

“The journey won’t be easy. Your faith will be tested.”

“And if you choose to give up, you will never have what’s at the end.”

“That is our price.”

“If you are not satisfied, summon us again.”

“We’ll change your fate and make amends.”

 _“Do you accept our terms, Sabrina Spellman?”_ The witches finally asked in unison.

Sabrina seemed to be holding her breath during the entire time. The witches still held their unchangeable gaze at her. Their eyes were red as the wool around Sabrina’s wrist.

And now Sabrina had to make a decision. She could follow this string and see where it led her. Or she could demand the witches to change her life and lose something she had no idea what it was in the process.

_We offer you a peak. Show you what you seek._

The words echoed in her mind.

_There is no answer. But it is at the end._

The witches were still there, standing in silence and waiting for Sabrina’s answer. And although Sabrina desperately wanted to make things right, she knew by now that the easy route usually wasn’t the right one.

“I accept.”

 _What’s the worst that could happen?_ Sabrina had nothing else to lose at this point.

Sabrina’s voice was strong and the air thickened instantly as the three witches held hands and closed their eyes before announcing.

_“Show.”_

_“Show.”_

_“Show.”_

The red string on Sabrina’s wrist tugged again to the point of hurting and it started to shine like it had this glowing red aura. The fire of the sigils disappeared and so did the witches and Sabrina was left alone, with a glowing red line around her wrist that stretched out, cutting through the entire Greendale forest.

Sabrina had been walking for weeks now.

She didn’t warn anyone about her departure. She just teleported to her room, packed a bag, snuck in Ambrose’s bedroom to steal his map and compass, and teleported away again.

She had gone to many places. Today she was in Berlin. The red string was glowing stronger and cutting through the city, showing Sabrina where she had to go. But it seemed like every time she was close to reaching the end, the string moved in the opposite direction.

So there she was again, walking towards something that was basically running away from her.

Sabrina waited until the string stopped in a fixed direction and then headed to it. She ended up in Portugal. She was in the south end of the country, but Sabrina’s red string was still going straight ahead and shining across the Atlantic Ocean.

She sat on the edge of the rocks, her feet dangling above the ocean before she pointed the compass to where the string was heading. The wind was strong, the skies were gray, and the smell of the sea filled her senses. It was calming and soothing and Sabrina wished she didn’t have to be going through all of this by herself.

_She wished Lilith was there with her. She wished she could know if the woman was at least alive._

Sabrina thought of giving up. She was exhausted, she hadn’t slept well in weeks, and she had no idea how following a red line around the world was going to help her save her family. And just as she was about to give up, she remembered the witches’ words and the compass immediately locked on a position. The map on her other hand showed Sabrina the direction she had to go and maybe it was a sign that she had to keep going. Sabrina just sighed and got up to leave.

She crossed the Atlantic Ocean and arrived in Brazil. And she kept following that damned string. It was glowing stronger, warning her she was close to the end, but this had happened so many times by now that Sabrina didn’t even get her hopes up.

On the map, the line was passing by a lot of places, but at one point, it crossed right above this small town on top of a mountain, and Sabrina decided that was a good place to start looking.

Night followed her when Sabrina finally arrived. The town was very charming, with Christmas lights on the buildings and lampposts, even though it wasn’t Christmas yet. It felt a bit like Greendale. Sabrina observed the people along the streets as she followed the line, turning right and left whenever she needed to.

There was a possibility that Sabrina would just end up at the edge of the city like had happened so many times, and it meant that the line was going way further ahead and Sabrina had reached another dead end.

Sabrina walked for about ten more minutes before she arrived in front of a small wooden house. She walked around it but the red string was still stretching towards the small home and Sabrina gasped at the realization.

The wind was cold but the shiver in Sabrina’s spine wasn’t because of that. What she had been seeking for weeks was there, inside that little house. It kinda looked like a cottage actually.

She felt a fear at the bottom of her stomach. Who knows what she would find across that door. But whatever that was there was better than to keep running around the world following a fucking red light.

Sabrina knocked twice and heard a muffled voice coming from inside answering in Portuguese. _“Um momento, por favor!”_ It was a woman’s voice.

She fidged on her fingers, anxiously waiting for who would answer. Was that woman the solution to her problems? Or maybe it was something inside the house? A magical object perhaps? Sabrina had no idea. But she didn’t wonder for much longer because once the door flew open, Sabrina saw _her,_ and everything made sense.

Lilith’s past two months had been messy.

She had been running away from the Dark Lord this whole time and she had to switch locations every couple of weeks to make sure she wasn’t being followed.

It hadn’t been exactly easy leaving Greendale behind, especially Sabrina.

They had gone through so much together. But Sabrina did the transference behind her back and Lilith wasn’t even angry at her because of it. She was disappointed yes, but never angry. She knew Sabrina never intended to hurt her. But now Lilith had to live this life - if she could even call it that. She didn’t even know if it was worth it running away anymore.

She had an unconscious tendency to always choose these small towns, maybe because she missed Greendale. Or rather something - _someone_ \- else.

Lilith wished she could be honest with herself and just admit it, admit that she was in love with Sabrina. That she had been in love with her for quite some time now and that she just had never found a way of saying it to her.

And that was the reason she hadn’t given up yet. Maybe there was still hope that Sabrina would find a crazy solution somehow, and they would reunite and Lilith would be able to finally _say it._

It didn’t really do anything good to nurture those hopes since Lilith was just waiting for the doomsday clock to hit midnight. But her mind always found a way to betray her, always going back to those happy memories with the half-witch. Lilith wondered if Sabrina was okay and if she missed her for some reason.

It was torture daydreaming about Sabrina, but at least it kept her going somehow. Pain and love were always very intertwined in Lilith’s mind.

One night she actually dreamed about Sabrina. She dreamed of her opening the door to Mary Wardwell’s cottage and finding Sabrina on the front porch with that smile. She really missed that smile.

So when on the following night Lilith heard a knocking on her door, she was caught by surprise. She usually never bothered locals and her heart started racing at the thought that maybe it was the Dark Lord. He had finally arrived to put her out of her misery.

Lilith took a deep breath before opening the door, but the person standing there knocked all the air out of her.

_“Sabrina?”_

Sabrina saw that the red string tied on her wrist was stretched out only a few more steps - and the other end was tied up around Lilith’s wrist.

_There is no answer. But it is at the end._

“What are you doing here?” Lilith asked breathlessly. Sabrina looked in shock and she kept staring at her hand.

 _“It’s you.”_ Sabrina whispered, slowly getting closer.

“How did you find me?” Lilith asked again but it was like Sabrina couldn’t listen to her.

Sabrina let her fingers wander to Lilith’s hand, touching her wrist where the red string glowed. She watched it in awe when Lilith laced her fingers together and the red light finally faded away. She had done it. This was it. This was the end.

“Sabrina? What’s happening?” Lilith called her again and Sabrina finally looked up at her. Her brown eyes were full of tears.

Lilith’s own heart was beating out of her chest. She had no idea what Sabrina was doing there or how or why, but _oh,_ how it moved her to see Sabrina in her front step. It was everything Lilith had wanted for the last months.

She stepped backward, pulling Sabrina inside the house and closing the door behind them with her free hand. But Sabrina gave another step forward, entering Lilith’s personal space and her stomach dropped to the floor.

“Sabrina,” Lilith’s voice was shaky. Sabrina was suddenly _too close._

“I traveled the world looking for an answer, something to help me save everyone, save _you._ I-” Sabrina let a couple of tears run down her cheeks and Lilith’s heart barely held it together. “It’s you. It’s been you all along. And I didn’t know. I- I’m-” And now Sabrina was fully sobbing. The exhaustion taking over her body.

“Shh, don’t cry, my love. Please, don’t cry.” Lilith couldn’t bear to see her like that. She cupped Sabrina’s cheeks in her hands and leaned in, kissing away each of her tears and trying to hold back her own. “I’m here. I’m here with you, Sabrina.” Lilith didn’t recognize her own voice. “I’m not going anywhere without you, my love.”

How easy it was to drown herself back in the half-witch and that feeling that warmed Lilith’s heart. Her lips were soft, kissing each place that held a tear in Sabrina’s skin. That was until Lilith planted a kiss right on the edge of her lips, and she felt Sabrina lose herself beneath her.

Sabrina moaned, her voice so needy and wanting and Lilith felt like her body caught on fire. It was that melodic sound she had heard only once, on the day Lilith left for hell and she kissed Sabrina’s forehead with that same tenderness. How long hadn’t she waited to hear that sound again.

Lilith let her nose brush against Sabrina’s and she heard that sound again while Sabrina tightened her grip on her waist. Her heart melted into a puddle. Sabrina was _whimpering for her_ and Lilith had no strength to deny what they both clearly wished. So she closed the distance and finally - properly - kissed Sabrina.

It was magical. It was transcending. It was miraculous. It filled both of their hearts with hope of a future.

Their lips moved in sync and Sabrina moved her tongue inside Lilith’s mouth with familiarity, like she had done it a thousand times before, like she had always belonged there. Sabrina sucked on her tongue and her bottom lip with such desire and tenderness, it absolutely broke Lilith. Her mind was crumbling into little pieces while she realized what was happening - and Lilith cursed in her thoughts for not having kissed Sabrina long before.

Lilith’s hands were on her hair, pulling her closer, and Sabrina had never felt so alive like that moment. Everything made sense. With Lilith by her side, she could fight anyone and anything.

When they were both out of breath, Lilith pulled back and found herself staring at Sabrina, trying to read her thoughts through her eyes.

Sabrina was thinking about everything and nothing at the same time. It was obvious now. She had no idea how she hadn’t realized how poetic everything really was.

Lilith was the first daughter of the false god. Sabrina was the first daughter of the Dark Lord. They were two sides of the same coin.

But then again maybe none of these big words mattered. Sabrina was just glad she had found her. And then it finally hit her.

Lilith tilted her head when Sabrina started chuckling, still sniffing a couple of times because of her previous tears. “What’s going on in there?”

Sabrina came back to reality after Lilith’s question.

“Oh, it was just something I never understood but now I guess it makes sense.”

“And what is that?”

“If you want to find something you have to lose it first, right?” Sabrina answered with a sad smile and Lilith’s heart broke again. Sabrina looked down, not really ready to face her again, and then words just started spilling from her mouth. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for doing this to you, and I know I was stupid and I shouldn’t have done the transference behind your back, I’m so sor--”

Before Sabrina could keep talking, Lilith pulled her to her lips again, her hands still cradling Sabrina’s face as they kissed.

“Don’t do this.” Lilith whispered between kisses. Her lips were so soft and warm, it was intoxicating. “Don’t apologize. You don’t have to do that with me. Okay?” Sabrina nodded her head and Lilith sighed with relief. Finally, Sabrina was listening to her. Lilith let her thumb softly brush over Sabrina’s cheek, paying attention to her touch to make sure this moment was real and not just another figment of her imagination. “I’m so happy you are here.”

“You were not easy to find, I can tell you that.”

Sabrina laughed and opened up that smile, the one Lilith dreamed about and missed so much and it was like nothing else mattered. Her eyes got glossy and she had to take a deep breath so she wouldn’t cry there on the spot.

“Are… you okay?” Sabrina asked hesitantly and Lilith was the one laughing now.

“I’m better than okay, my love.” Lilith giggled before planting a final kiss on Sabrina’s lips before she took her hands and guided her further into the house and the bedroom. “Tomorrow we fight. Tonight, we forget about everything and pretend fate is in our hands.”

**Author's Note:**

> The references are from Macbeth Act IV, Scene I if you guys wanna check that out!
> 
> Comments and kudos are always lovely and appreciated!
> 
> also why do I feel like this kinda deserved a little smut but I was too lazy to do it oops


End file.
